Tuesday, October 25, 2011

All Grown Up

This past week was such a long one and my emotions were all over the place.  My best friend got married on Friday evening and as excited as I was about that we had to get through some really rough stuff earlier in the week. 

Monday night we buried her grandmother, Wednesday we buried the groom's grandmother and finally on Friday we were able to celebrate with them, their joining in marriage.
It was such a super fun and fantastic event starting with the rehearsal dinner the evening before at her parent's place.  Then we had a day of pampering and champagne, champagne, champagne!!  All of us girls got together to spend the day with our bride and it was great.  Everyone looked fantastic in their purple strapless dresses and of course the bride was as stunning as ever.

The ceremony was perfect and I couldn't have smiled any bigger.  The flowers were gorgeous purples and oranges and reds.  They were married with a sunset back drop on a horse farm in the fall.  Can't get any more beautiful than that.

The reception was also an absolute blast.  Dinner and dancing and dessert.  My kids were on the dance floor from the moment the music started until we forced them to go home!  We all had such a fun time and went to bed way too late.

The next day however was a rough one as we left for Michigan at 6am to attend my Great Uncle's funeral.  This is the uncle who raised my mother and was the only father she ever really knew.  So we visited family while we were up there and did have a good evening with my Grandma Em and Uncle Steve and his lovely wife Janine.  We went back to our hotel and didn't get to sleep until well after midnight- kids included.

Driving home, everything seemed to hit me.  I am all grown up.  When I visit Michigan my family is no longer all in the same town.  My Grandfather passed away last year and now when I visit, I can hardly stand to see their house because it makes me so sad to not have him sitting in his chair.  My grandma still lives there but can't be by herself right now due to a knee surgery so she is staying with my Uncle.  Driving through the old town makes me sad.  Everything has changed and times aren't as easy and fun as they used to be. 

My cousins have all moved away and have their own families.  People I looked up to and admired turned out to be just regular old people who struggle and have faults.  I know this is all part of growing up but some of these changes I just don't like or want to handle. 

Maybe I am being a big baby about it, or maybe I am now truly realizing what being a grown up means.  It means sleepovers with the cousins, jokes with your grandpa and weeks on the farm have ended.  Now we have less visits, less people to visit and there are family members that we don't really even know.  There are funerals and headstones to visit when there used to be people to see.

Like I said, this has been an emotional week that has been like a roller coaster for me.  I am so happy on one hand and on the other, completely devastated.  Being a "Big Kid" is much harder than it seemed when I was little and looking up.

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