This may differ for each parent out there but this week I had my worst parenting experience. Of course, it wasn't when my son was kicking screaming and acting a brat. It wasn't when my daughter blatantly hit me in the face to get a reaction. It is not moments like these that add up to my worst parenting moment. Weird huh? You would expect those would be the moments that would be terrible.
My worst parenting moment started Monday night when I arrived home from work around 1am. Getting ready for bed and my son starts to cry. I am thinking, "he must have to pee or something" so I head up there and he tells me he has to poop and immediately pukes all over me!! He ate hot dogs and I am wearing a white bathrobe. I panic and don't know what to do so I start CATCHING IT IN MY HANDS??? Yup until I realize "What the hell am I doing???" and I lose it and grab a blanket that is sitting there and him and run downstairs. I wake my husband up with a holler and he heads up to clean the mess that has covered the bottom bunk.
(Listen I had an intolerance for hot dogs when I was a child. Speaking from both perspectives I will say that hot dog puke is the worst for the "giver" and the "receiver")
Thank God for the sectional sofa. I set him up a sick bed with barf bucket and cold water and washrag in tow and set myself up on the other sofa. I couldn't sleep cause he kept saying he had chest pain. Chest pain??? When I finally do fall asleep I am lucky that before he gets sick he tosses and turns cause he is uncomfortable and that wakes me to be by his side. We spend the whole night like this but get pretty much no sleep.
His face was white. His lips were white. He was limp in my arms and shivering as he is trying to puke or poop or what he doesn't know? He is writhing in pain and I CAN'T DO A THING. It was the most horrible moment of parenting I have ever had. I couldn't take it away. No matter how much comforting I did he still had to get it all out of him and I just cried. I prayed for him and I cried. I know that I will have many more moments that I want to take away the pain. I want to take away the hurt and the sick. This is the sickest he has been and it broke my heart. It broke my heart for so many reasons but mostly cause he is my baby. I remember what it was like. I remember that no matter what Mom or Dad did I just had to get it out. I remember their hearts breaking while I was sick or hurt or just not myself.
It is moments like these that remind you of how much you love someone. Your baby. Your blood. Your life's work. Your child.
No comments:
Post a Comment